Thursday, September 17, 2009

Fear of the StarCrunch...

Time to get serious- well, not really but kinda. I have a serious phobia. Not of heights, clowns or mice BUT of... washing my Peppermint Pattie to find that a sexual experience has turned my puddy cup into a damn STARCRUNCH!

The 25 cent delectable school treat with its creamy chocolate covered cluster exterior is reminiscent of a STD infected snatch. I saw a video during an Anatomy class in undergrad of a woman in her mid 20's with a BAD case of herpes or warts. I cant remember exactly but I do know it reminded me of my old after-school snack and I haven't eaten one since.

I am proud to say that I have NEVER had a STD. NEVER! The thought of getting some sort of coochie infection is probably my worst fear. I kid you not. Not too long ago, someone that I used to deal with told me that he had a contracted and treated a STD a long time ago (before he met me) and I damn near hyperventilated. I'd rather lose an arm than walk around with some incurable disease that would make my snatch look like it was attacked by termites.

With that being said, I urge all you grown folks out there to please get tested and do your routine check ups to make sure the privates are up to par. Some diseases show no visible signs of infection but can be life threatening- such as AIDS. It may not look like a StarCrunch or Crunchbar now but that doesn't mean the goods are "good".


* ! zodiac ! * said...

wow, but u have every right to be scared cause these std's are no joke

☆Reese✮ said...

Gotdamnit..why you had to find a pic!
I'm witchu though, I'm very very a'scared of that happening to me! Bleh!

simone_dior said...

i feel you though. i don't never wanna hear the doc telling me i got a problem with my Jonas Sista.

stephanie said...


@simone_dior: jonas sister?! (:

Epitome said...

*waves hand in the air*

You betta pa-reach girl! If I ever caught ANYTHING over some damn peen...heads would mu-fuckin ROLL! Yall would see me on the news I swear fo gawd

Krissy said...

"I ain't no pouta I keep my punani clean!" -crooklyn

Damn straight!

Anonymous said...

"STD infected snatch"....LOLOLOL best comparison!

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