Monday, November 2, 2009

Hoe-lloween.. Part 3. Finale

I'm done with Halloween. The days of trick and treating are over... dressing up and going to the club surrounded by slutty police and sexy cheetahs are over. I cant.... From now on, I'll just take my kid out and finish the night out with a glass of wine and Nightmare on Elm Street marathons.

My Halloween started on Friday night as I celebrated with my home girls at Love for D's birthday. It was kinda dead but I still enjoyed myself. Friday was just an appetizer for the bullshit that was gonna occur on Saturday.

I have never seen so many hunch back, square back women with exposed skin in my life. Please have some class about yo shit! Using Halloween as an excuse to be naked is not where it's at and most of the "sexy" i saw was not. The creativity that Halloween used to bring out is no longer there. I saw too much of the same shit. I would need 100 hands to count the sexy race car drivers, Ghostbusters, french maids, Strawberry Shortcake, Alice, Batman and Michael Jackson costumes that were swag surfing.

So- ya girl went dressed as Cleopatra. i know, I know... I was supposed to be Poison Ivy but... that didn't work out. Anyway, on Saturday I had a blast grinding on Sunshinestar at Lux Lounge on Saturday. Oh, how I love thee sunshinestar for her wittiness and ability to give the stank eye simultaneously to four people at once. LMAO
I had fun but I realize that my clubbing days are slowing dwindling down and I can no longer fuck with the club scene on Halloween. Was I entertained by the anomalies, random drunk white girls, the fight that almost started because some chick didn't want to dance and the fight that did happen between two drunk fools? Yes, however, it was just too much cooning and stankocity for my po lil virgin soul. *sigh*
Halloween at the club is a damn set up. Too many masks and painted up faces that can cause further confusion with an already liquored up state of mind. I know it was hella men that thought they were hooking up with Beauty and ended up with a Shrek-faced Beast. If I did drink I wouldn't have drunk on Halloween for fear that I would end up with something from Gremlins.

Anyway, for the high-lights...
*Dude dressed as Julius Cesar... dude body was on point and just like I said on Twitter that night "I woulda fucked him and yelled 'Spaaaarrrrtaaaan". Then again- probably not. Too many crunch bar dicks in DC for me.

* There was this dude (and sunshinestar has pics to prove) that was dancing so fucking hard I thought he was having an epileptic seizure. Not only was he making these weird faces but his grinding was so off beat. I must've laughed at his happy ass for at least 15 minutes straight.

*Me and sunshine almost got trampled by these 3 big girls with killer dance moves. I wish you all could see how we were smushed in the corner as these bigback chicks got their eagle on. I'm happy they were getting there cardio in an' shit but I almost lost a fucking eye.

Khaki's Halloween Awards

Not that my opinion matters or anything... Hold up, its my blog so my opinion does matter. Here are my awards for the night.

Weirdest, you crazy mufucka costume: Guy dressed as Hannibal Lector who coulda got some if he wasn't so in character. UGH- ole fool was just standing in the middle of the floor looking like he was bat shit crazy. Yes, i woulda let him cannibal me... freak? sorry, something about crazy men drives my nuts. LOL...
Another one? costume: Hands down... the sexy police officer. That shit is sooooo played. Try again.

A for Effort- The Jabowokeez at Love

What are you s'posed to be again costume? male (Lux): Ole boy with the flannel shirt that couldn't stay away from my boo gets the side eye for wearing that Ice Cube in Friday flannel. Deebo, please try again.

What are you s'posed to be again costume? female (Lux) complete with caveman wig, turkey feathered bikini, barefoot, with gold bangles I'm still confused as to who this nappy headed bombshell was supposed to be... It's a toss up between a ghetto turkey and the African dancer from Coming to America.

Attention Whore female (Lux): Shorty dressed with the big ass head piece that kept hitting folks in the eye. I see you and I knew somebody was itching to slap that shit off of yo head.
Attention Whore female (Love): Strawberry Shortcake on 3rd floor that was grinding and booty clapping on everyone from Wolverine to Rainbow Brite.

Attention Whore male (Lux): Fine as silk Mr. 300 himself with his muscles and greek sandals was looking de-fucking-licious. However, the fact that he kept letting hoes touch him made me think that he was all about attention. For the record, I still would have been his Cleopatra.

Attention Whore male (Love): Michael Myers kept that hot ass mask on all night and made sure everyone saw him and that baggy ass Dickie jumpsuit all night.

Best costume male (Lux)- MC Hammer. He had the fade with the parts, shimmery pants and big shoulder'd bolero an' erethang. He was the most creative and i saw no one dressed like him

Best costume male (Love) - white dude dressed as Prince. Pure hilarity. I wanted to ask if he had pancakes so bad.

Best costume female- I would have to give it to the bull-fighter chick I saw at Lux and Pebbles at Lux

hmmm... I guess that's about it... or all I care to say at this time. LOL

How was your Halloween?


sunshinestar110 said...

LMAO....we did see our share of weird shit! I never and i repeat never want to do that again..unless its like a Halloween party thrown by someone

☆Reese✮ said...

Lol the awards are too damn funny, but wait is it a good thing I didn't come down? Cuz I definitely woulda knocked homegirl's headpiece smooth the fuck off!

Glad ya'll had a good ol' time though..foxy cleopatra *snicker*

SinfulLyo said...

*clinks wine glass* let's sit back and enjoy freddy krueger together lol. i feel you. i didn't bother going out this [hoe]lloween. it's a night for stretchmarks, cellulite, and bad weaves to be flaunted...i'm all set!

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