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Thursday, February 4, 2010

Not Black Enough?


Long before American Express came up with the concept to give the rich another way to spend their millions, another Black Card existed. The Black Card. The card that validates your blackness. A card with high fees, low interest, extensive requirements and a lifetime contract without an option to trade or cancel.


Right next to an expired Macy's credit card and a business card for stripper lessons lies my laminated invisible Black Card. I'm a proud carrier but only by default because I've been told I'm not black enough. Not because I'm the shade of... hmmm a pair of khakis... but because I'm not Angela Davis or Malcolm X. Apparently, I do not exhibit the true strengths of an African American. I've been told that only a real Black woman would rock her hair natural with no perm or extensions. I can't be Black because I love me some 18 inch yaki's and I'm easily annoyed when my Mizani perm grows out and I see my naturally curly hair growing from my roots.


Stereotypes about my culture that I despise have somehow become requirements to be considered Black. The same racist stereotypes that "my people" hate to hear another race say are the same stereotypes that "my people" have embraced and hold as a system to rate ones blackness. Hypocrisy much?

Apparently, I haven't earned my blackness because I wasn't raised in the projects and I didn't go through the struggle that most of the Black community has went through. Here I am thinking that being Black was my first birthday gift and, apparently, it's something that you earn through passing some sort of Black Test. Had I known that my blackness would've been tested, I would've prepared better and studied. Had I known that my treasured Black Card was going to be revoked because I flunked the test and didnt pay my dues, I probably would've watched Roots a little earlier in my lifetime. I want to be a Certified Negro but I don't know the criteria and nobody told me this was going to be a Pop Quiz.


I love being a Black woman and I love my golden skin. It contains my culture, beliefs, morals, and the African blood running through my veins. My skin doesn't and shouldn't dictate what I should like, who I should like and what I should be in life. I don't have to explain my blackness to anyone. You can see in my face that I am a distant relative of a king. I don't have to wear "urban" clothing or know every rap song to be Black. I will listen to any fair skinned person I want to. I voted for Barack because he made sense not because he's half Black. BET sucks ass. I support interracial dating. I cant stand grape or orange soda. The Cosby show annoyed me at times but I love JJ, Florida, Thelma an' nem. Shit, I even say "an'nem" too.

How can I make myself more Black so I can keep my card? Can you be too Black? What is enough?

11 comments:

JStar said...

Such stereotypes....And I get the opposite..."I am not white enough" I mean what does "Acting" a race mean, seriously...We are a product of our enviroment...If thats what is around me and what I see and all I know, how else can I be? I get you think/act black...Huh?? what does that mean, because I dont eat mayo on my sandwiches??? First we dont wanna be classified by the stereo types of our culture, then we go around stereotyping...I like this post a lot...People tease my daughters all the time because they are mixed...They would come home crying saying "Mommy they called me a white girl" I am like sweetie, you are half white...then they look in the mirror and say but I am brown mommy...and people say, "If you have an ounce of black blood, you are black"

Its just crazy...I stopped listening to others opinions of me, I am who I am...Love me, or leave me alone...

Piph said...

I totally agree with JStar. I'm also mixed, and people are always saying that if I have a little bit of black in me, then I'm all black. And just for the ignorance I say, "No bitch, I'm white."

*stacie-ann said...

oh my god. my best-friend is like goin thru this "gotta be all black, or no black" phase. it got sooooo bad that she was praying my son would be born dark skinned? i mean like, just b/c were light does that make us any less black? ehh..

whether we are dark or light, long weave or "nigga naps" the "white man" sees us all the same. hell. they'd might even say we "all look alike." ehh

I loveeeeee this post.

Anonymous said...

Nothing is ever good enough. When I was younger I was “too white” because I talked proper and had nice clothes. Since I’ve gotten older, I’ve been called ghetto because I speak my mind and I like colorful nail designs. Plus people tell me I must not want to be black because I love me some 14” yaki sew-ins. People are stupid, plain and simple. I gave up trying to make people happy along time ago, I just do me.

Just Another Black Man Out Here Trying Not To Be A Statistic said...

you know, i fucks with this blog...and i fucks with this post. my family are real self conscious people, and i was raised growing dreads from the age of 2 before niggaz start rocking the shit for fashion. i remember one time i wanted to cut my hair before i turned 18, but my pops wouldn't let me because of what it stated and it was like he was saying i would lose some of my blackness. i somewhat understand what he is saying as far as the statement growing that hair made in society. but i didn't lose an ounce of my identity. now at 18 when i cut my shit, i still read the same black literature, had the same pride, rocked with the same culture niche, and was still me. like i posted in a post in my blog, i don't give a fuck about skin tones. i love all shades of my black women, or black people for that matter. as long as you know what you are then fuck another motherfucka, and not out here promoting ignorance. plus, after this post and that haiti post, shouldn't nobody question shit about you being black or anything because that was one of the most intelligent posts on the matter that i had seen.

SinfulLyo said...

now you know i hate weave so i can't cosign the yaki lol but i'm loving this post. it's funny because my mom always called my bf and i "paris & nicole" because we acted so "white". the irony? my mother grew up in a prominent white neighborhood, went to strict white catholic schools, and had nothing but white friends until she went through that rebellious stage and started hanging in the hood trying to be down. hot ass mess right?

well long story short: i am who i am. i don't fit anyone's mold and i don't want to. i'll be damned if i ever feel the need to prove my blackness to anyone...now pass me some cornbread :]

Krissy said...

This is a good topic of discussion. I thinking "being black" in the since of the card are subjective. You can't wash your skin tone away and you can't change your history. You are what you are. You were born into it and when you die, you'll still be black. That's just what it is.

eaglebird said...

First off what is all this yaki shit I hear you chicks speak of like I'm being for real what is it? Second by me reading your blog I can see why some say you aint black enough and I aint talking your skin tone,(by the way you can get IT! real eazy like) I'm talking your bright personality your humor shine like the sun,son you got that last dragon glow yo'(in a b'more native voice)them monkey cant see past the porch so how they going tell you how the sunrise?

p.s you got one of the most funniest sence of "BLACK" humor I read,so I say fuck'em we all born different dont worry your pretty lil face bout that,them type people just speaking there insecurities and placing them on you.

..kraziibipolarchick.. said...

gurll *pops gum* im definitely rockin a 18" as we speak.. :)

zodiac said...

i rock weave and my natural hair, like i said bofore hair doesn't define shit! you're black because you have the blood from your ancestors running through your veins, nothing can change that, not even a perm

E's said...

Great post. Continue to DO YOU, FUCK EM - I know you will. I deal with some ignorance sometimes for the stupidest of reasons...because I read a lot and like to do different cultural shit occasionally and not afraid to be the only black guy in the room.

I'm called "corny", "nerdy", "trying to be white"...WTF? But what I notice is when ppl are around me, they step their games up though. And the caliber of ppl who GET ME are the kind of ppl I want to be around...

Fuck trying to please backward thinking, victim-mentality, whiny, boot-legged lace front wearing, boxed-in-thinking fuckers...I do me, confidently, and most smart ppl follow suit.

This ain't high school no more, I ain't trying to fit in:) Great post!

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