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Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Where do I apply to become a groupie?

I got this list... the I'd Hit It list. Basically, it a list of men that given the opportunity I'd fuck em and never speak to them again. The men on my list make me say naughty old man shit to myself... you know... shit like "I'd drink his bath water". Yeah... old man shit like that. Anybody that I am in a relationship with would have to be understanding to my desires to smash this penis noted on my list. Sorta like my personal Dick Bucket list. I have to fuck em before I meet my maker... i just have to.
1st up...
Lance Gross
That Ms. Eva is a lucky little bitch. Ironically... I wasn't "on" him until I saw him with her. He's a cutie on House of Payne but when I saw him posing with lil Ms. Top Model I added Sexual Chocolate to the list. Not saying I'd fuck her man but I'd fuck her man.

Next...
Trey Songz








Don't know what it is about this man! Maybe its the groupie stories on sites like Lipstickalley.com or Ballerallert.com but whatever it is I cant control it. I'm not a fan of lanky dudes but I'd switch it up for Trey. Listen to that song on his 1st album, "In the Middle", and tell me you cant imagine him with those pretty teeth digging into yo shit.



And...
Willy from Day 26
Ms. Simone Dior... I feel you but like I said to you on your blog "you can't fuck him until AFTER i sit on his face". Sweet Dick Willy (yup, that's what I'm calling him!) is the finest nigga in Day26! Sheeet, he's the finest nigga ever to sign a contract with Bad Boy. I'd fuck him... in the rain... outside... on the 4th of July... wearing a clown wig. Yes- it's that damn serious.











And...
Nas
Yup... Nas made the list. He got that chipped chopper fixed and that makes him a definite winner. I fell for this nigga when I saw him in that white suit on the Hate Me Now video. Damn... I would love to get tossed up to his song "Big Girl" fromt he Nastradamus CD. Say what you want but I should've been Mrs. Nasir Jones.








And...
Will Smith
I got a love thang for Will that goes back to Fresh Prince of Bel Air. He's tall, clean cut, with a sexy smile and a scrumptious body. The man is damn near (if not) 40 and looks damn good. Doesn't make it better that Jada keeps talking about how well he can fuck. Then he teased me in I Am Legend doing them chin up's... had me squirming in my chair. Damn, Will. Damn!










And...
Reggie Bush
This chocolaty goodness is FFFIIIIIIINNNNNNNEEEEE (said in my old horny man voice). Woo lord! I love every bit of Mr. Goodbar. Kim don't know what to do with that. That's why she walking around here trying to get him to put a ring on it. I don't need a ring Reggie. We can do this... no strings attached... unless you have good dick then I'd have to stalk that ass.









And...
Columbus Short
I know, I know... He's not that popular but there's something about a man that can pop lock and spin on his head that just does it for me. I saw cutie in Stomp the Yard and told myself "Self, if you ever run into him... Fuck him- no questions asked".






And...

Pooch Hall

I'd totally go groupie for this nigga. fucking CW cancelled The Game so I wont be watching him shirtless on Fridays anymore. DAMN YOU CW, DAMN YOU TO HELL!

9 comments:

dearly beloved. said...

ooooh im co-signing the fuck outta this list. er mu'fucka on it can get these drawals.. no questions ask.

dearly beloved. said...

Asked*

khaki said...

calm down- this is my im fucking him bucket list! LMAO

Jay1 said...

if you had a picture of me i woulda made this list.

so where do i send the photo?

khaki said...

khakibeauty@gmail.com
holla @ me jay lol

simone_dior said...

lmao, girl I cosign this list. u can have sweet dick willie first if I can smash pooch hall first. I just wanna grease him down like a cake pan and ride him!

khaki said...

NOOOOOO! Not Pooch. Aight... I got SDW first and you can take... Nas. Final offer.

the YOUNG LIONESS said...

yes! yes! yes!!!

MISS BEE said...

Og jeez you gotta nice lil list going on right here. Something about Nas is just SOOO sexy although I dont think he's my type. I fell in love w Willie of Day 26 after I saw the episode of Making the Band w him & his son.

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